Wedding Guest #TheNwachukwu’s 12.15.17

Oh yea! I cut my hair again. Do you like?. This past Friday Jasper’s brother got married. It was so beautiful and I’m wishing them a lifetime of pure joy and happiness.

Normally I take more photos but i was very active so this is all I had time for. I did snap a bit during the event.

My sister joined me with her friend

Rachel & Leona.

Overall, it was a beautiful night! Congrats to Arlena and Chisom Nwachukwu !

Ijeoma’s 20th Birthday.

Hey guys! Yesterday was my sister’s 20th Birthday so i wanted to surprise her with a birthday cake and as I was walking through the aisle at a local grocery store I see her carrying a birthday cake. I was shocked and told her what I was doing there. I told her she had to let me pay for it and she did. So we headed to her place and spent time with the rest of my siblings. We sang happy birthday, gave speeches and wishes and just enjoyed each other’s company.

I been slacking on being a big sister, for years I’ve been very protective over my siblings and thought I would have been able by now to carry them to take some stress of my parents. But of course, me having limited resources to create something for me has caused me to be at a stand still for a long time. However, I feel that will all change soon. I feel a breakthrough coming and now glad that I am documenting my journey.

Here are a few of the photos we took together… enjoy! 🙂

The Observer.

 

“People see me and perceive me in the worst light

Find it hard to read me I ain’t speaking, I observe

Cause people will deceive you I ain’t really tryna’ learn lies

Searching for meaning with my burnt eyes

When I’m old and I’m grey and I’ve been through it all

Ask me what I’ve learnt I say I’ve learnt life” – Solomon

I’m baaaaaack!

Hey guys!! It’s been a while. The Last two months have been a blur. As I wrote on a previous post “The Waiting Game” you’ll understand a bit of what I’m talking about.

I received a phone call from my lawyer a few days ago and it was a reminder from God that I should have hope that things will be ok. I honestly didn’t think I would get through this rut i had been in off and on for months now. But that phone call?! Ahhh I will tell you all soon and I promise I will make the news loud! 2018 is my year to plant seeds in my garden that I’ve worked hard on!

Oh I don’t know how we do it, but I think God has his hands on the both of us. My relationship suffered because I was so caught up in my own shit that it had become a norm to fight everyday with my partner. Most of them caused by me. After several fights, conversations and communicating properly we worked through it. And his family coming to town and spending time with them reminded me of who I am, what I wanted and what makes me happy, Him!

I took a social media break for about two weeks and during those days it was brought to my attention that as I was going through my mood swings and getting on social media looking at other people being active and living had affected me and my perspective of what reality, my reality was. Which made it so much easier for me to fall into a mood. Social media breaks are necessary now for me. Oh and during this break I realized the people that actually cared to talk to me in real life and not because I made a post on snap or Instagram lol. Hey Bestie and my sister Leona! Love u both dearly.

If you follow me on Instagram you’ll know I’m also on a 90 Day Mind Body and Soul cleanse and I’m on Day 28. And in these 28 days I’ve rediscovered hope, realized how my mood can affect those I love and how being more present in life is such a benefit for me. I wonder how i will feel by Day 60!!! I’m excited and looking forward to documenting my journey.

Here are a few photos of me! You know I love a good selfie and Snapchat filters!

Mental Warfare 1

My life as of today is not where I want it to be. I mean no where remotely close. However, I am mature enough to take accountability on certain things I have done that have led me here. For example, blowing my tuition money because I wanted to be cool and shop more than i cared about going to class. This didn’t mean that I was dumb because as time has gone by, I’ve realized I’m a smart girl. That action led to me causing pain to my mother who was working her ass off to front my bill while she worked in Nigeria. Then, I had no regard for money or understood anything about money. So you see, my mother is the love of my life. She has always been there for me. She made sure I went to the best schools, she wanted a grand education for me. She too was trying to prove something to her peers, that because she is a single mother does not mean she was a terrible mother and she could take care of me. I never doubted that. I didn’t understand this at my early 20s so I suffered terribly because the person who always believed in me was hurt by how selfish I could have been and that led to me feeling disappointed in myself. My father and I never had the kind of relationship my mother and I had. So I couldn’t even call him to be encouraged, so I shut down.

This was the beginning of me facing myself in the mirror everyday knowing that a decision I made had caused someone I loved dearly to view me differently. I started my process of growing up and realizing that every action I take defines who I am. I didn’t know this then, I’m sure if I did I wouldn’t have made these mistakes. And those mistakes wouldn’t haunt me after so many years. I find myself in something I call a mental warfare now. In order for me to heal I have to talk about it. So this is mental warfare1. If I can help someone or let them know that they are not alone in their battles maybe we could all conquer together.

Oge in Flair.

Happy Post Thanksgiving! Hope you all enjoyed the holiday with your loved ones and family! I stepped out in a Ankara style Jumper by Flair . I love this jumpsuit. I always think I’m bigger than what I am, might be a psychological warfare I’m going through a times. I thought I would need a 1X buy I was was able to get fit the Large and still had some room to move around. So I would say her line is definitely true to size. Tell her Oge sent you! 🙂

I hope you all had an amazing thanksgiving! MUAH.